The Things We Used To Write. Another Philatelic Yarn !

I have just been having a sentimental look at the archives of a GB group I belong to. A real 'trip down memory lane' if ever there was one.
I came across a number of strange things I used to write, and believed in. I had a laugh.
Has anyone here ever done this ??
Can you share a few snippets from the past ??

Here is a stamp story that may go to print next month in a British Stamp Journal.
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COLD SWEAT !
" How did she know that", he said out loud to himself.
He paused a second, shrugged his shoulders and went on his merry way. It was the 4th of October, the day of a new stamp issue and he did not want to be late at the post Office.

London was surprisingly summer like. A light breeze, nice sunshine with just the odd cloud to break heat of the day.

The middle aged man had made his way to the big Post Office in Central London. He had been there many times before that year and even knew some of the Postal clerks by name. Indeed, he had often commented to others that he could have found his way there with his eyes closed. Doubtless they did not believe him, this being one of the busier parts of the capital !

It was early and for a new issue day, eerily quiet. Where were all those collectors he had seen and chatted to so many times in the recent past. Could they have forgotten about today; Could they have missed something. He thought it strange but nonetheless continued on to the Philatelic Counter. No queue !

He peered through the protective glass and there was a man with his head down, as if in half-sleep. He was a balding man in his forties, at a guess, and did not notice the Middle aged man.

"Huh Hum, excuse me but I would like the new Smilers stamps please".
The postal worker looked up, opened his eyes fully, and said apologetically, " Er, sorry I was just ...er, well it's been quiet today and er.............."
" That's OK. I would like the new Smilers Stamps please"
The Postal worker opened the small drawer in front of him and handed him 1 booklet. " One pound eighty pence please sir"
" Also the Smilers sheet please because the stamps are not the same and I collect all the varieties"
" Sorry Sir, but the sheets are only available in Customized form"
He handed the man a form to fill in.
" If you would like to fill this in and pay fourteen pounds ninety nine pence then I can order it for you. I will of course need a photograph "
The middle aged man stopped admiring his booklet and looked at the man. " WHAAAAAAAAAT ! You want me to pay 14.99 pounds for stamps with a face value of 6 pounds. Do you think I'm stupid or WHAAAAAT !" His voiced reached a higher level. "I have been coming here all year, week in week out, spending my good money and now you want to cheat me into paying more than double for stamps...NO,NO,NO,NO,......."

" NO,NO,NO,NO,". The middle aged man woke up in a Cold Sweat, shaking. He was relieved to see it was morning and noticed the sun shining through the window.
" Are you alright dear". His wife came in the room with laundry and noticed her pale looking husband. " Yes, bit of a nightmare that's all"
He dressed quickly and went downstairs for breakfast. His wife noticed that he was quiet as they ate their Eggs and Bacon. He was usually quite chatty.
" I am going out for a while", he said to his wife after the meal was over. He went to get his coat.
" I don't think you will need that today", she said. "It's quite hot for October. And don't forget the new Smilers stamps are out today".

The door closed behind as he stepped into the warm sunshine. Then he stopped, a sudden chill came over him and he was goose-pimply from head to toe.
"How did she know that"

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I also saw some posts from collectors I have not heard from in a long time.
I wonder where they are now.

Londonbus1....never knows where he is !

Very nicely written Michael. I hope you share more of your writings.



Butch

Thanks Butch !

Here's another short one, when I had a gripe about GB presentation packs !
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A STAMP STORY

I have decided after all to take a table at the Monthly Stamp fair at the BIG shopping centre in Tel Aviv. I will try to make some money instead of spending so much time with this damn computer. Getting on my nerves anyway.
How can I make some money more quickly. Some time ago, back in 1997, a new printing of the Castles High values was issued. It is known as the Enschede Printing. Pity they were not printed in the UK but no matter.
I purchased the Stamps on my Yearly 'Stamp Tour' but as I had no stockbook to place the stamps in I decided to get the Presentation Pack instead. It was only a few pence extra.
That was 8 years ago.

Now it is 2005, and I have been lucky enough to win at auction some 1992 printings of the High value Castles at well below face value.
I have an idea. Somewhere among my bits and pieces I still have that Cover of the 1997 P. Pack. I took the stamps out long ago. They are in my Album. Yes here it is.
I go to one of my pricelists and see that the 1992 pack can be had for about 15 .00 pounds, but the 1997 pack would cost a whopping 70.00 pounds or more !!
So what if I put the Castles I won at auction into the Empty 1997 presentation Pack cover and try to sell it in Tel Aviv for about 40.00 pounds. Pretty sure no one would question me. Why, we could even look in the catalogue together to see the values !!
Great Idea....YIPPEE. Lets see what else I can do with Presentation Packs !





This is a situation I have made up. But could it happen ? Are Presentation Packs open to cheats ? Indeed, why ARE they open....at one end I mean ? If they were not, then I would not have written what I have just written.

I would ,of course, never cheat anyone. I would never take a table at the Tel Aviv Stamp fair because it is too expensive. I would like to spend MORE time with this damn computer but work and family will not allow. It is NOT getting on my nerves; indeed if there was no computer at home then I would be getting on everyone else's nerves !! I do not need money so bad that I would need to resort to cheating my fellow collectors.........but maybe someone else would. A non-collector perhaps. Check your packs.

Now back to those Lundy's !

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Londonbus1..raking up the past

Great stories Londonbus

Keep em comming

Nice write up Michael!

reminds me of the series "twilight zone" about ordinary fragments of life that later, as ordinary as they may seem to be, become deep, profound and life altering events! wow!

Nice write up!

Thank you Dianne and nic.

Here is a true story.

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THE TOWN WITH THE WORLD'S LONGEST PIER.

What the heck has that got to do with stamps I can hear you saying! The answer....absolutely nothing.
Indeed some may not know what a pier is.
Well, a pier is a long metal and Wooden structure that sticks out into the sea at large and small coastal resorts.
Many are pleasure piers some are purely for business or life -saving vessels.
But what the heck has all this to do with stamps ??
Absolutely nothing !
Or has it ?
It was Tuesday July 5th, and I was in Southend-on-Sea, the Town with the World's Longest Pier, visiting two dear old Aunties who always give me money to spend on stamps, on my yearly visit to England. Really it's true.
They want me to buy stamps.....so I do.
So on this cool, dull Tuesday I took a break from Tea and Chat to take a walk to town and see what I could find.
On the way to the only Stamp Shop around, I happened to pass by the Post Office. Remembering they had a Philatelic Counter of sorts and with the rain beginning to dampen my T-Shirt, I entered.
" Hello, I would like 1 Trooping the Colour Miniature Sheet please"
" Would you like anything else Sir"
"Yes, I want 2 Bronte Sisters Miniature sheets also".
I was being served by a very polite and nice postal Clerk, but at this last request of mine a grumpy old man[who had been standing with his back to me] turned around to inform me [grumpily, well that's how I knew he was grumpy !] that they only had stock from the last 2 months...those are the rules[He said].
I did not know this.
I was about to pay when a huge pile of those uglier than Ugly, wasted opportunity End of the War Celebrations mini-sheets caught my eye.
" Oh, is it out today", I enquired, genuinely not sure of the issue date.
" Yes, would you like one". She was giving me the good saleslady banter!
It worked, gruff !
"Yes please, I'll take four".
I handed over the money for the order and as she handed me the change, I stepped back to go.
" Would you like the receipt?" She asked
" No it's Ok, thanks anyw.......". I paused for a brief second and changed my mind. I could not pass over this once-in-a-holiday chance to have a laugh.
"Actually yes I would very much like the receipt, I would then have a constant reminder of how much money I wasted in this Post Office today!"

Well, her look said it all. Gobsmacked is putting it nicely. I grinned, took the receipt and never looked back.
So, if you are ever in Essex, and have the chance to visit Southend-on-Sea, the town with the world's longest pier; and if it's raining a little and your T-Shirt is getting wet; if you are sick of seaside amusements and soggy doughnuts or if you simply want to buy one of the World's ugliest Miniature sheets, then hop along to the Post Office and have a laugh with a lovely postal Clerk........and don't forget to ask for a receipt !

Londonbus1
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WOW ! That one's over 5 years old !
Come on, did no one used to write little ditties ??
Let's see some of your work and words !

Londonbus1.....off to search

PiP !!???

Here is something I wrote in August 2006 about changes to the Postal Rates in the UK. It was all the news for months and made for great writing and argument.

Pricing in Proportion....and what it meant!

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PRICING IN PROPORTION [PIP]

PiP. The day has come, Part 2.
by Londonbus1 on Sun Aug 20, 2006 8:17 pm

I strongly recommend to steer well clear of Post Offices tomorrow if you need to go there for something other than letter and parcel posting.
For those retired persons who want to pick up their state pension...stay at home.
If your Post Office is nestled inside one of those cosy little supermarkets then do your shopping in the evening when the Post Office is closed.
Or indeed, if you are a Philatelist, do not go to the Post Office to get something for your collection. you will probably be attacked ! On this occasion Royal mail issued the Stamps BEFORE the occasion so you don't need to join the melee for FDC's.[Weren't they kind!]

But why all this Panic ..........

P I P !!
Pricing in Proportion.
Paying for size AND weight.
try to test yourself from day 1 and see if you can get the hang of it.
If you pre-ordered the cardboard PiP Measurer in advance then you will have an advantage. It is strong and everything is explained in an accompanying leaflet. Professors and those with 400 A-Levels should have no problem.
I ordered 3 to be delivered to family members in different towns but they all went to the same address in different envelopes !! A good start.
If you waited until the flimsy paper model arrived at every household without the slits cut out then you could be in for a hard time.Try cutting the slits out properly. then try holding it up with one hand while trying to put a letter, or worse still, a parcel through with the other hand. Of course you can always get a family member to help.[No help if you live alone is it!]
Failing that you can always go to the Post Office . Once there, you can use the Perspex version they have promised to install in every Post Office. that's if you can get to it for the hundreds of angry people with the same idea.
And then don't forget you have to not only see if it fits through the slits[or not] but also to lay it flat against the PiP Measurer to see what size it is !![As opposed to thickness].

Are you with me ?
Good.
Once you have determined that it is 5mm or 25mm thick and 240x165mm or 353x250mm in size you are ready to take it to the scales to be weighed !
If you can get there for the rush that is.
"Hang on a mo"
"My letter is 3mm thick but is more than 240mm long but not as much as 165 mm wide !"
"And I haven't even weighed it yet"
"Hey, when I was at home it fitted through the 5mm slit, but here it doesn't!"
"Which PiP measurer did you use?"
"The PaperOne"
"How did you cut the slits out?"
"With the bread knife !!"

....and so on.
It will be fun and games for sure.
Just incase you don't know, or do not live in Jolly old Britain the pictures in the first PiP message were;
From top to bottom;
The cardboard version
The paper version
The Perspex Version.

I will continue with PiP's again after I get some feedback during the coming days both here[I hope] and from friends and family in the UK.
In my opinion[Oh No! You are thinking], the stamps are just awful. Arnie would not be too pleased. What on earth were the SAC thinking of.
And then they issue new stamps for letters and large letters...but none for parcels. Why?
What have parcels ever done to RM to warrant such a snubbing ? If I were parcels I would fight back and try to squeeze through those 25mm slits!
Another little oddity[I am sure there will be many more].
In the August edition of the British Philatelic Bulletin, on page 361 there is a price list of the new rates and it is explained fairly simply although not too comprehensively.
It is still somewhat easier to understand that all the info that arrived on 60 million doormats !!
But who buys the BPB ?? Stamp Collectors !

So don't worry if your letter is more than 240mm long but less than 353mm while at the same time being more than 250mm wide their will always be someone to help.
In the words of that famous Beatles song from the sixties I can hear the Postal Bosses ...
"We can work it out".

The question is when ?
Prepare for a Looooooonnnnnnggggggg visit to the Post Office in the coming days. We may even see people sleeping outside to get in first in the morning like at Wimbledon or a Pop Concert.
Just think of it..............

Londonbus1.....Safe in Israel ![Who am I kidding]

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COME ON YOU LOT, I AM SURE MANY OF YOU HAVE WRITTEN GREAT STAMP STORIES,ARTICLES AND DITTIES.
SHARE THEM WITH US ON THIS THREAD.

LONDONBUS1

nice articles Michael
It would be tough for me to do even anything close!
But we do have lots of piers here, we have 7,151 islands depending on the time of day

Every year whilst on my annual holiday in the UK, I take a day off to be by myself to do something philatelic. Just one day alone.......

This year was spent in London at Stampex and I wrote about it here.
I usually write about this day and so.......
Here is 'my day out' from 2005.

Such memories.........

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A STAMP TOUR.

Nothing much happens , Philatelically speaking, here in Israel, so I always look forward to my day alone in London during my annual holiday. This day is devoted solely to stamps, nothing else only stamps. No kids,wife,eating,museums or sightseeing. Only stamps !

This year, MY day was Saturday July 9th, only 2 days after the attrocities that killed so many people in this great city. It saddened me a lot and it was always at the back of my mind, but both Prime Minister Blair and
the Queen stated emphatically that " life must go on, we must not bow to acts of terror". I agreed.

So with this in mind, I left my home at 06.30 am and drove to the outskirts of London. from here I went by Tube,Bus and [mainly] foot.
My first stop was the Charing Cross Collectors market underneath the Railway bridge.I used to come here many years ago and it had not changed much.A better place for selling than buying, I was offered 38.00 pounds for my S/A Submarine Booklet.I declined but it was a fair offer.I managed to pick up a few Flags and also an oldish album with Worldwide mint. The latter cost me only 12.00pounds but had a Cat.Value of over 100.00 pounds[and counting !]
From here I went to the Strand to visit Stanley Gibbons and the Stamp Centre.At SG I purchased some stocksheets and drying book[for soaked stamps]. Stamps are too expensive here.Across the road there was quite a commotion going on so as I wanted to go to the big Stamp Centre I ventured forth.
What bad luck ! The commotion WAS the Stamp Centre. Stars from Doctor Who were signing commemorative covers and the shop was closed to us strange people who did not want them.The moving Dalek outside warned me that I should not argue if I wanted to survive the day.
Irked somewhat, I moved on.
Next stop.....the Post Office. Always an important part of any London Stamp Tour but somewhat reduced in size from former years, I entered the big Post Office just off Trafalgar Square to purchase all those 'Lovely' stamps we have been talking about all year ! Closing my eyes a little I walked up to the counter and gave him my list. The very nice man manning the Philatelic counter, asked me why I looked so strange and was I feeling OK. I assured him I was OK, told him to put all the Stamps in a bag and handed over an extortionate amount of money, then retreated. Phew ! It was over and I didn't even get a look at the "Royal " Wedding sheet.I felt a little happier once I was out again on the streets of the City.My wallet though, was sadly lighter !
I visited a few more of London's Stamp Shops in the area without buying [my wallet refused to open] and then looked at my watch to see how much time there was left.
My overworked memory reminded me that there were a few stamp fairs around London on this very day. This info I had gleaned from the Stamp Magazine some days before and I remembered too that one was in Finchley Road in North London.This was the closest from where I was standing so I rushed down to the nearest tube station for the trip north.
I arrived in good time and without much difficulty. Inside this lovely Church hall were just a handful of dealers. I only visited 2 and promptly ran out of money !
From one I purchased 10 South African Stamp Exhibition Souivenir Sheets.....very lovely they are too.
from the other I found many Gb Cinderellas and Locals, including some nice Old Lundy Items which delighted me no end.I left that place a happy man......until I looked in my empty wallet. Only a sandwich for me this day !

So that was it. Over for another year.No money left; hungry;Tired; and I still had to get back to the car in order to get home to Mum and Daughter.But in my bag were lots of Goodies and on my face a smile as big as a Cheshire Cat that Lewis Carroll would have been proud of.See you next year Oh! lovely London.

Londonbus1

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Which reminds me, I must start planning for this years day out...

Londonbus1.... [London 2010?]

Another great reading Michael!

yes, whenever I attend an auction for stamps and coins, I make it a point not to bring a checkbook and just enough cash for whatever pops up and covers the items listed on the brochure.

First time I attended, I ended up the same, almost no cash left in wallet and a chunk in unscheduled issued checks, all for some very nice items! unforgetable auction that was!

Thanks nic !

I have only ever been to one public auction, and that was especially to bid on some Palestine lots. I was outbid on them all.

Now I only bid on Internet auctions and I am usually outbid there as well !

Next up, a little piece I wrote a few years ago with a connection between Stamps,Car accidents and a little girl.

Have to find it first

Londonbus1.....Having fun reminiscing.

There's a technique there Michael, dont start the bid, just wait until the gavel bangs down "going once...going twice..." and then raise you number just to squeeze in your bid, hopefully the other bidder, wouldnt notice it, may have thought he won and so didnt respond anymore won some that way!

In auctions, attentiveness is crucial!

If I ever get to another public auction, I will try it !

I wrote this little piece the day it happened in early December 2005.

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Today should have been a nice day, full of enjoyment,stamps and Good Christmas feelings.

But today was a day of sadness,bewilderment and bad Israeli Drivers !

I finished work early, collected my things together and set off to meet our member Shiny Scorpion for an afternoon at the Tel Aviv Stamp Club followed by Christmas shopping. I was thrilled by the prospect of a nice afternoon and evening.
However....my plans were shattered by a bad Israeli driver who could not explain why he swerved from his lane to the next causing another car to be thrown in front of me in my lane. I didn't stand a chance.
Now I have no car; there was no Stamp Club; and I did not have any Christmas feelings...or presents. Add to this the fact that my little girl was worried sick all afternoon and the day was as bad as it could be.

As I said goodbye to the car at the garage It began to dawn on me how lucky I was. I was not injured,I did not lose the stamp Albums I had taken with me,and I did not spend any money !
Did something good happen ??
Well, yes it did.
As I opened the door to the house, my daughter came running to give me the biggest hug you can imagine !
It made my day...in a sense.

I am tired and am off to sleep.
I can thank God that I am able to do so.

I just wanted to share this with you all.
Goodnight.
Londonbus1.....The thankful One.

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From good to bad and back to good...and all in the name of Philately !!

I can see there are not many here who like to share their postings, either from SCF or elsewhere. I guess you are all shy.

So I will run a competition and offer some unusual PRIZES !

WATCH THIS SPACE FOR DETAILS COMING SOON.

Londonbus1

Once again great Writings Londonbus.

I enjoy them very much. Thanks for sharing them with us.

Dianne

Londonbus how about including poems in your contest? I'm pretty weak on article write ups but I do write poems, and they are in english, at least readable! I'm in a great mood today, my dog just learned to sit!

One year on, let's have another story.

A LONG MYSTERIOUS JOURNEY

The wind howled as it had never howled before and the rain thrashed down upon the sodden ground. It was a real winter's day.
The poor man had gotten wet more than a few times and was glad that his working day was coming to an end. Soon he would be in the nice warm comfort of home. He was tired, but today was one of the 'Babysitting' days so it was to be a time of fun and games with his 1½ year-old Grandson. An excellent reason then, to get home early and be ready for the 'second shift' !

Shortly after 4.30 his wife came in carrying the little one and within seconds they were running around the house with cars and soft toys going everywhere. He loved these moments. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw his wife put the mail on his desk. It looked like a brown envelope.

During a break for baby food and drink, the man wandered over to his desk to check the mail. Only one brown envelope, very creased and sad looking, sporting a PPI 2nd class Royal Mail label which he thought looked a little odd. The envelope had been opened.
The contents appeared to be present though, although a little out of shape. It was the February edition of Stamp Lover, the Bi-Monthly magazine of the National Philatelic Society [UK].

"But hang on a sec" he said to himself,
"I already have the February edition"

Without a second thought, he went to the cupboard and reached for the NPS file. Sure enough, it was there....but it wasn't the same . "What is going on" he wondered.
Back he went to the copy on his desk...yes, February 2010...."Hey, what the ..."
The family looked up.
The man had received a missing copy, long since replaced, dating back almost 13 months !
What a long and mysterious journey that must have been on he thought to himself. And that PPI is worth some research, it looks so strange.

But a tiny hand was tugging at his shirt.
The research would have to wait 'till later.

Londonbus1